DEBRIS.COMgood for a laugh, or possibly an aneurysm

Shocking news! Microsoft Outlook is NOT responsible for the propagation of foot-and-mouth disease — researchers are startled to finally find a virus that the email application doesn’t like.

(Thanks, Jeff!)

A few weeks ago we learned that Network Solutions sells domain owner’s private data to marketing firms. I encouraged readers to transfer domains away from NSI, and in fact I have been doing that. My scorecard: I’ve personally transferred 10 domains from NSI to other registrars.

This gives me a front-row seat for NSI’s latest operational disaster. I can only assume, based on comparative pricing, that NSI is losing thousands of domains per week. (As of this writing, NSI’s default renewal invoice is $70 for a two-year term, whereas Dotster charges only $11.95 for a transfer plus $14.95 for the second year, for a savings of $43.) If that is the case, then it’s safe to say that the business guys at NSI are sweating their market-share numbers, and are being pushed hard to stop the hemorrhage of accounts.

Their answer is dishonest, and possibly illegal. They’re now trying to sell something they cannot provide: they are sending invoices for renewals after domains have been transferred to other registrars.

In mid-February, I initiated the transfer of a domain from NSI to Dotster. On 2/17 I received an email from NSI indicating that they’d approved the transfer request. Then on March 2 — 13 days later — NSI sent a paper renewal invoice for the domain, with eye-catching red letters indicating “FINAL NOTICE” across the top.

The invoice claims that “timely receipt of payment will ensure registration services for the period noted above.” This is untrue. The domain is no longer registered at NSI, so they have no way to extend the registration term. Is it legal to offer for sale something which the seller cannot provide?

Clearly, most individuals will remember that a domain has been transferred and will therefore not make additional payments to NSI for that domain. But what happens when the billing contact is someone else, or there is a breakdown in communications? I’m sure some percentage of these phony renewal invoices get paid — and I’m equally sure NSI will refuse to refund erroneous payments, because I’ve been told as much by their telephone reps. This is also indicated by NSI’s Service Agreement: All fees are due immediately and are non-refundable.

Cautious readers may object that an isolated paper bill could be an anomaly — the lead times for issuing paper invoices could easily exceed the 13-day period indicated above. I propose that lead times for emailed invoices are significantly shorter… and I have a second example of NSI’s new bogus-billing system:

Today I received an emailed invoice for another domain recently transferred. NSI sent me their acceptance of transfer on 3/9. Four days later, on 3/13, NSI invoiced me for a $70 renewal.

The Net has always demonstrated a peculiar affinity for haiku. A quick search turned up Y2k haiku, Mr. Jenkins haiku, Survivor haiku, Clinton haiku, and my two personal favorites, Spam haiku and Unabomber haiku.

These formidable ranks have been joined, perhaps bested, by the latest entry: Piggypoop Haiku. Oink!

January 15, 2001 — Go.com buys the centerfold spread in the Industry Standard, “introducing the new Go.com”, pitching their new “interactive” advertisements called ActivAds.

In a move that was probably designed to appeal to the corporate executives in the Standard’s readership, the ad instructed readers to contact Thomas Hartman, VP/Worldwide Sales — no phone-sales flunkies here, no cube farm of MBA interns in Plantronics headsets… your ad order goes straight to Mahogany Row!

January 29, 2001 — Disney lays off the entire Go.com staff and announces plans to shutter the go.com website.

According to The Industry Standard’s calendar, that insert was placed on December 11, or possibly earlier. So the time between rolling out a hopeful, high-profile new ad campaign, and giving the boot to 400 people, is a measly 49 days.

In this economy, that doesn’t sound too bad; running full-tilt into the wall is in some ways preferable to the alternatives. But it is ironic when the company it happens to boasts that their new ad technology is “as close as you can get to being psychic.” If they were really psychic, they might have been able to predict that betting the company on an online ad-sales business plan, after a 6- or 9-month slide in online advertising rates, wasn’t such a hot idea.

As a somber postscript to this episode, we confirmed (with a quick call to the phone number in the advertisement) that Thomas Hartman, VP/Worldwide Sales, is no longer working at Go.com.

It has recently been discovered that all varieties of the Windows operating system, as well as Outlook and Outlook Express, are a virus!!!! Telltale behavior includes shotgun forwarding of phony virus warnings to the entire address book!!!!

I received two copies of an absurd virus warning this weekend. It’s difficult to tell which is worse, the threat of a destructive virus, or the pileup of warning emails that precedes it. Actually, I know what is worse still: most varieties of the Windows operating system, which in their gross vulnerabilities encourage panic-stricken, distrustful users to spam the entire planet with virus warnings.

I don’t happen to use Windows so I’m immune to 99% of the viruses that these emails warn about. The next challenge: becoming immune to the email pileup.

What was curious about the latest “virus warning” attack is that it references McAfee’s website, presumably to gain the credibility of their anti-virus brand. However, a 30-second visit to mcafee.com indicates that this particular virus (“A Virtual Card For You”) is a hoax. Worse still, this hoax was listed in November of ‘00, meaning it’s been circulating the net for at least three months.

Windows users should bookmark this site: McAfee.com Virus Hoax Listings.

Gene Spafford, author of Practical UNIX & Internet Security, wrote a fascinating article describing why Windows is so vulnerable to viral infection, and suggests ways to reduce its huge vulnerabilities. Even single-machine homes can benefit from this. See also these steps to disable Windows Scripting Host, a primary vector of virus propagation.