DEBRIS.COMgood for a laugh, or possibly an aneurysm

Bad habit: reading the Sunday supplements. I admit it; I spend 20 minutes each week skimming through USA Weekend and Examiner Magazine and whatever the other one is, I don’t even remember.

There’s always a health or fitness column of some sort. It’s probably in USA Weekend because it’s so USA-Today-like — they boil a complex issue down into 4 bullet-items with a little cartoon illustration, thereby saving the population the need for higher education. They make it simple, so the reader never has to think.

These articles are oddly compelling. Like I said, I read them every weekend, mentally checking off each bullet-point as if the tally would predict something meaningful about my health. In the recent article about hemorrhoids, the bullet points under “prevention” included:

• drink lots of fluids
• avoid meat and dairy
• exercise regularly
• eat high-fiber foods

I read through them all, feeling better with each item — “I already do all that!” I exclaimed aloud. Clearly, I’ll never get hemorrhoids.

So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.