DEBRIS.COMgood for a laugh, or possibly an aneurysm

Today I was amused to read that Toppik, a cosmetic solution for thinning hair, is packaged in “an elegant, discrete molded container specially designed to dispense the fibers through 167 digitally optimized openings.” That is, a plastic shaker bottle.

This wins my first-ever Corinthian Leather Award, which I will assign periodically as new instances of ridiculous, obfuscating marketing language come to my attention. Submit yours today! You might win this genuine faux-woodgrain pressboard plaque!

(“Corinthian Leather” is a phrase invented by Chrysler’s marketing department in the late 1970s, when Ricardo Montalban was hawking their autos via a famous series of television commercials. There is no such thing as “Corinthian” leather. They made it up. And yet everyone believed it, to the point where today some companies still sell “Corinthian Leather” foil handles and bible cases. Whether these vendors are deceived, or simply attempting to cash in on Chrysler’s 25-year-old deceit, is an interesting question, suitable for discussion when you’re next trapped in an elevator, or trying to pass the time during your prostate or cervical exam.)