DEBRIS.COMgood for a laugh, or possibly an aneurysm

I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.” There is a corollary to that expression: “People who live in stone houses shouldn’t.”

You might have expected the corollary to end “shouldn’t throw glasses.” Well, that’s dumb. Nobody should throw glasses; I don’t care what kind of house they live in.

People who live in stone houses, shouldn’t. Period. Unless everyone else lives in a stone house too. Because if you are the only one in your community who lives in a stone house, there won’t be a contractor within 100 miles who has any idea how to work on it.

“Oh, your house isn’t wood?” they ask, but not until they’ve seen it, because… why would they ask?

All we wanted to do was install some new windows. Any $20/hr apprentice carpenter can cut a hole in a wood-framed wall and install a new window, but we can’t even have an existing window replaced. Guys who own glass shops come by and tell me they’ll sell me the windows, if I want to install them myself. “If I had the tools, the skills, and the confidence to cut enormous holes in my house and install replacement windows,” I ask them, “do you really think I would type for a living?”

After weeks of searching, I found a general contractor who was willing to take a chance. He bid on replacing a few windows, and although we pretended we were shopping around, we’d already mentally agreed to pay whatever he asked because he was the only chance we’d have to get the work done before winter.

A few weeks later, the windows arrived, and the general contractor came by to introduce the guy who would actually be doing the installation. “I’ve never done anything like this before” is the first thing the guy says to me. Note to everyone in the construction industry: this is not an ideal way to build customer confidence.

He did an excellent job, though. We quickly ordered three more windows and begged the contractor for another bid (which is a 3-week process, even in this economy).

Finally the new windows arrived, along with the contractor and two new guys who will be doing the installation. (General contractors, generally speaking, don’t do too much actual work. They mostly drive around and oversee the $20/hr guys with toolbelts and paint on their jeans.) “This is Rodney and Gabe,” says the contractor, motioning to two guys with toolbelts and paint on their jeans. “They’ll be installing your windows today. I’m going to Disneyland.” And off he went.

Rodney extended his hand. “I should warn you, I’ve never done anything like this before. I’m a carpenter.” What a shocker.