DEBRIS.COMgood for a laugh, or possibly an aneurysm

In defense of Guitar Center, an employee (or someone who claims to be one) anonymously sent the following internal corporate memo. It explains the crazy-low microphone prices noted here recently. Here’s the memo in full:

This month, we are LIQUIDATING our entire Oktava Inventory. Due to various Intergrity issues, Guitar Center has chosen to no longer do business with Oktava. I don not want to take up too much space with the entire story, but if you like more info, feel free to contact me. Here are the most important things you need to know:

1) MKL2500 and MK319:

Both of these mics that you are selling right not are the official, made in Russia Oktava microphones, to the best of our knowledge. We are selling them below our cost because we no longer want to be associated with the problems this company is going through right now. Anything that your customer reads on the interenet is written by people who don’t know the real story, and they are simply trying to protect their interests in selling these products for a lot more money. (note: this is inregards to a customer bringing a print out that has the MKL2500 being sold for $699 US instead of Guitar Center $99).

2)MK012 (all versions of the 012- MK012K, MK012KM, etc)

The majority of these mics that we have were made in China. We had negotiated a deal with Oktava to sell the mics that would be made in China, but we did not anticipate such a differance in the sound quality. There are proabably a few of the Russian ones still out there in ou stores, but there are very few left and I would not spend a lot of the time trying to find them. You can tell your customer, yes, there are Oktava mics, made in China from the Oktava designs. They do not sound the same as the original MK012, but are very comparable to other microphones made in China. They sound fine for a $69 dollar mic!

REMEM, BE COURTEOUS WHEN DEALING WITH ANY UPSET CUSTOMERS OVER THESE ISSUES. WE ARE SEVERING RELATIONS WITH OKTAVA BECAUSE GUITAR CENTER WILL NOT SELL QUESTIONABLE PRODUCTS TO OUR CUSTOMERS.

3) One final note, some of the MKL2500’s may have issues connecting the cable from the mic to the power supply. You mave to fuss with it a little bit, but it should work. If it absolutely won’t work, put it on RO and return it to the DC.

We will NOT e able to repair any of these microphones.

Thanks for all your patience and understanding.

You are all THE BEST!

This memo goes a long way to redeem Guitar Center in my eyes. I think the misleading ad copy on their website was an honest mistake and will likely be corrected soon, because it’s clear that the folks in charge are aware of the controversy and are actively distancing themselves from it. I’m happy to see GC stand by the statement made to me by their Oktava buyer back in May — that Guitar Center would not knowingly sell fake or counterfeit gear.

Regarding the sound quality of the 012 series… if Aidan Humphreys’ Oktava mic test is any indication, these mikes are very comparable in performance, even if they’re not as well-built as the originals. Anyone looking for an inexpensive condenser could do worse than the $70 (sale price) ASM MK012.

Previous Oktava news.

The Chronicle’s Friday section contained this amazing photo:

The photographer is Jack Gescheidt. It’s worth a trip to see more photos of his TreeSpirit Project. The Chronicle article is worth a read, too, if you’re into photography, trees, or naked people: Photographer goes out on a limb for his art. (But: shame on the Chronicle copy editors for writing such a lame pun for the headline.)

The image is spectacular on its own. My initial reaction was even stronger, though, for I’d just finished reading the newspaper section’s somber cover story, Educating Californians on Lyme disease. The article introduces Bob Lane, a professor of medical entomology at UC Berkeley and a 30-year expert on tick-borne diseases. Dr. Lane concludes that “the people at greatest risk for contracting the disease were those who had direct contact with wood — including sitting against a tree or on a log.”

And the next thing my eye falls on is this poor woman.

Der Spiegel, SF Chronicle, Flickr’s katrina tag

There are some amazing shots within the NOLA galleries too.

The aerial shots from stern.de are some of the best I’ve seen.

(Thanks to Bim for all the German links.)

Remember the “counterfeit Oktava microphone” controversy?

Ken Heaton of Oktava USA wrote to point out a misleading advertisement from Guitar Center. In its description of the “MKL2500,” the copy claims the mic is “Hand-built in Russia.” This is almost certainly not true, as anyone familiar with the controversy will tell you — for the Russian mic manufacturer severed its ties with the company selling these mics in the Fall of 2004.

That said, this mic, which was probably manufactured in China, might sound great, and if so $100 is a fantastic price. But it’s not really an Oktava microphone, and in my opinion Guitar Center is doing its customers, not to mention the Oktava company, a great disservice by labeling it as such.

The other misleading thing about the Guitar Center advertisement is more subtle. The picture of the MK-012 shows, but doesn’t label, the 10 decibel “pad” that is shipped with genuine Russian Oktava MK-012 mics. This is misleading because, as of May, 2005, the Chinese versions of this mic sold by Guitar Center did not come with this part. Perhaps the Chinese supply has been updated? As usual, caveat emptor.

Here’s the original ad.

One of the interesting aspects of this story is that, in May, Guitar Center staff had no idea they were buying Chinese rather than Russian mics — because I told them as much, and their buyer’s surprise was genuine. Since then, I’ve personally verified that the news had filtered down to the level of the bag-check guys who stand by the door. Guitar Center can’t claim ignorance any more.

Update: leaked Guitar Center internal memo tells the inside story!

My summer recording session is proceeding according to plan. By which I mean, I planned to be several weeks behind. That’s why I allowed myself an extra month.

I had two goals:

• upgrade my studio gear and my tones
• appear on as many CDs as possible

The second goal meant working with songwriters who are more likely to release CDs in the near future than I am. I found several. Here is the current track list:

I’m taking a lot of time with these projects — sometimes a couple weeks to work up a demo, then a couple more once the demos get approved (which itself can take weeks, if not months (hello aaron!)).

The untitled gospel/techno tune is a remarkable exception. Given a scratch bass track and a stylistic reference to a tune I’ve never heard by an artist I’d never heard of, I turned around two demos in one evening, and recorded a final take in another evening. It ended up being a pretty basic groove — there was no other way to play it, because none of the cool breaks had been written yet — but I was so pleased with it I listened to it a half-dozen times the next day. I have no idea what the final song will sound like, because the bass line has since been rewritten. So, basically, I don’t know what song I recorded, but I know the drum track is pretty cool.

In addition to the above schedule, I have another artist who I’ve promised four drum tracks. That project is somewhat at risk, because I’m postponing it until the rest of these songs are complete.

Also I have a half-dozen song fragments of my own bouncing around in various formats — GarageBand, ProTools, MP3, and even a digital 8mm videotape of neat dulcimer lines. I hope to put together at least one new song of my own before I have to take my kit down next month. It’s just a matter of time.